Dating with genital herpes stories
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And while there is the chance that he may decide to si, and that will really hurt, I also know that I want a man who will be by my side through thick and thin. I DID NOT get these sores until after he came home and slept with me too. Another common struggle among her patients is maintaining their sense of self-worth. What's more, anyone who disdains or genital you for having herpes genital never worth your while. The First Step: Rebuilding My Self Esteem. You will receive important details about how to handle your condition and how to live well with other positives. Between, I choose to look at this in the most positive light possible. Just tell your own success story like I did. She is an occupational therapist working with disabled and elderly people. Not only do I think I have oral genital herpes but I might have Hep dating with genital herpes stories, and it elements like my hearts been ripped out of me, and I think they are trying to drive me crazy. People who have found themselves dating or in a relationship with someone who has been diagnosed with genital herpes often have a lot of questions.
A woman wrote in to HerpesNews. The story involves an aspect of herpes that few think about. Dear HerpesNews, I hope you will print this because I think people need to know. I personally did not know anything about herpes. I had heard the word herpes, but I had no real idea of what it was. I surely thought that since I was in a loving marriage with a faithful husband, that I did not ever have to worry about getting a sexually transmitted disease. Anyway, it was a real shock to feel that there was something going on down there, and then to look down there and see what I saw. Not that it was shockingly gross, but it was shocking to see it all the same. What could it be? This might be too much information, but I shave and wax down there as the mood strikes me. I tried to think what I had been doing down there that could have caused this. Did I cut myself shaving? Is getting a Brazilian wax unsanitary? I very quickly made an appointment to see my doctor. My doctor took a swab and said they would do a culture. When pressed, he said it looked like herpes. When I told my husband, I admit, we both looked at each other strangely for a few days, but we talked about it. My doctor told me it was in fact herpes. I dragged it out of my doctor that yes, this is genital herpes because I have it in my genital area, but the type I had was HSV-1, which is more common in the mouth. He said that most people think of HSV-1 as oral herpes. He said that I was proof-positive that one can get HSV-1 in the genital area. I guess to him HSV-1 was less of a sexually transmitted disease. My mind was still running 1000 miles per hour as to how I could have got it. My doctor explained that if my husband had HSV-1 either on the genital area or on the mouth, that it could have been transferred down there on me. It was the first time I saw him get mad over the whole thing. I will admit, we had a bit of a row when I wanted my husband to get tested. I wanted him to get tested for HSV-1 as well as every other STD under the sun. He was insulted and started to act very strange. I mean, if I have genital herpes, then I had to have gotten it from him. My research, which my doctor confirmed, was that mine was likely a primary outbreak. And yes, my husband, bless his soul, does perform oral sex. I just wanted to know. I wanted to be certain. I wanted to know where I got this from. I gave him some space, but I thought it was strange. If it had been HSV-2 that I had, I would have started to become suspicious, I think. It was so irrational that it seemed like it was good old fashioned denial. Well, he finally went in and got all the tests. Yes, he had HSV-1. He probably has it on his mouth like most people do and just never saw any signs of it. Who knows, maybe I am the one that had it and gave it to him. Everyone has bit their lip or got chapped lips that cracked. Everyone has had some sort of sore on their lips or in their mouth at least once in their life. Can anyone ever be completely positive that they have not ever had a cold sore? Well, my husband is positive he has never had a cold sore. We have left it at that. We will see if I continue to have outbreaks, and if he ever has one. Throughout our marriage there have always been times when we are close and times when we are a bit more distant. Overall, this experience makes me feel even closer to my husband. We worked through a rough time, together. I learned so much from this story and I hope you did, too. I really connected with so many parts of it and feel I understand herpes so much better. I personally know many people who feel that if they suspected having an STD that was incurable they would not want to know and instead continue living as if they werent infected…this being a major reason as to why things are so easily transmitted. People even go as far as to talk down about other people who are infected even though they have not been tested in months, years or maybe ever. I was someone who always talked about how digusting it was to live with a disease like herpes and yet i still engaged in irresponsible behavior. Sure enough i was recently diagnosed with herpes and now have to reevalute my opinion standing from the other side of the fence. I know that there will always be people who are like I was and will never consider a person with herpes the same as a person without it. Thats the most difficult part about having the disease…because fortunately my primary outbreaks were very mild; almost so mild the doctor couldnt locate the lesion to test it. Hoping Im one of the people who experience less noticeable outbreaks as time progress…I will be considered pretty lucky and living with this disease will hardly affect me physically at all. I am still struggling emotionally with the fact of revealing this information to any future partners. I have decided to practice complete abstinence until i figure out a method to best address this issue. I dont ever want somebody to say that I ruined there life or make them feel how I felt on the day I found out…I will always pray that a cure comes out within my lifetime and that improve their habits to protect themselves until then. Anyways, I never had sex when the lesions were out, I had read that it was more contagious when the symptoms were active , so just never did. Well, the following week, I had an outbreak and did go get it tested. It was diagnosed with HS2. I was not in a relationship, and was not even dating. I actually had impetigo on my nose sort of like ringworm , and went to the doctor to get it diagnosed. Two weeks later I had my first outbreak. After two more within a month of each other I had it diagnosed, and it was HSV2. I can only presume that I had somehow come into contact with the virus and transferred it to the open sore on my nose. In other words, HSV1 or HSV2 are not necessarily the result of sexual activity. Becoming infected is not a sign of infidelity. I have been married twice since contracting it, and neither partner contracted it determined via blood tests. I just found out about an hour ago that I have HSV1 genitally. I, too, thought at first that the symptoms I was having were razor burn from shaving down there, coupled with a yeast infection. A question I do have for those of you coping with this is, what are the pre-symptoms you have before an outbreak occurs? Thank you so much for your help! This came as a big surprise to me and neither I nor my husband are promiscuous and we do not indulge in oral sex. We have been married for 24 years and have only had sex with each other. The only thing I did different this time was having tried Brazilian waxing for the first time. It was not a pleasant experience but since that day I developed UTI and things started going down. It was exactly a week from that date that I found my symptoms unbearable and went to the doctor who did swabs put me on a whole cocktail of antibiotics and confirmed I have HSV 1. Needless to say I very upset with the turn of events and I can only blame it on the waxing. I went to the doctor and I was told I had herpes. And then proceeded to have multiple affairs with four more women and never told them he had herpes. But he did go to the doctor and was diagnoised with having herpes. Now I live my life with the thought of trusting no one but God. Before we got married, we were both tested for everything and we were negative. He joined the army and they test every 6 months regularly. But after being gone in training as a combat medic, he got 10 days leave to come home. We had sex that first night, and both engaged in oral. For other reasons, 6 weeks before this, I was in the ER and ended up getting a lumbar puncture and blood work and herpes was on the list, but it came back negative. As of when my husband joined the army, he was negative. On day 11 after having sex with him for the first time in 8 months, I got a terrible case of hemorrhoids… i thought i was dying. There was so much pain, and burning no itching at all though. I felt like my tailbone had been broken again. My sciatic nerves were acting up as well. I felt like i had the flu and even threw up a few random times before the onset of the visible symptoms. He had just left back to training and I was taking pictures of down there with my phone, standing on the bathroom counter looking in the mirror… trying to get the very best angle, and from what I could tell, it was just really bad hemorrhoids. But that same day I started to see tiny white bumps, pimple type things, around my rectum. They would break just by touching them. Everything got worse after that. I could barely walk, my tailbone felt like it was breaking everytime I moved. I never even considered that actually. On day 16, I could not handle it anymore. But, I went to the ER this time. They gave me IV pain meds, I told them in detail day by day what was going on, and the Dr, when he looked down there, started to sort of poke at different spots around and on my rectum. The obvious hemorrhoids we SOOOO sensitive and SO painful. It felt like I was being branded like a cow, but with razors… like a bunch all at once. There was SO much swelling. I had also gotten some sort of infection just inside my anus.. Its a dirty place. But i told the dr that the only thing to have come out of there for over a week was blood and pus. I know, super gross. And even when that passed thru, it was excruciating. The Dr started poking the other spots and said they were legions. That confused the hell out of me, cause all my research had suggested I had an infection or a cyst just up inside that was making Everything else swollen and tender. A CT with contrast later showed that it was not the case. While the Dr was poking each legion, it was an entirely different pain. Like a burn, but deep inside the skin.. I hadnt looked in the mirror that day so I had no idea what he was talking about, because the tiny white bumps had all vanished. He told me it was very obvious that it was herpes. He didnt say why type or any of that… and I was Super confused, cause only weeks before, I had tested negative for herpes. Well, they ran the tests, whether blood or swabs, I dont know.. Drs dont seem to give you much detail. Almost as if all we need is a diagnosis and then we are fine.. Especially in my case, where it was in my ass to put it medically. We dont do anal. But no signs of it anywhere else.. The doc and my gyno had NO Idea. They put me on an antiviral and sent me home with WAY more questions and a growing heart ache that I still have. That was on a saturday. On monday, I saw my gyno of 15 years. She was SHOCKED that I had herpes. Especially when you are married and have both been clean up to that point. When my gyno examined me, she said all signs of the herpes were gone completely. Only the hemmies were there still. I showed her pics of before I went to the ER and she was horrified. So it visually vanished in 2 days. But my pain was still agonizing. And meanwhile, I have been talking to my husband who was back on duty across the US and giving him daily if not hourly updates. You can imagine how broken I felt when I was told I had herpes. And that simply because it was downstairs… it was genital herpes. My parents were helping with my boys, so they knew everything that went on. My father had an affair years ago that destroyed their marriage, but they rebuilt a better one together. So, when they heard that I had genital herpes… they were broken for me. He swears up and down that he has been faithful, and everything in me emotionally believes and trusts him. But, logically, how else could i have gotten any sort of herpes down there? The timeline of the initial outbreak fits. The fact that only weeks earlier I was negative. I dont condone it, but I could understand if he had slipped up. Not to mention that in basic training, they are told constantly how pathetic and worthless they are. Anyone deprived of human affection yearns for it where they can get it. They are robots in training. But, until he is tested for HSV-1 AND HSV-2, and until I am RE-tested for more details and specifics… all I know is that a few weeks ago, i was getting ready to move to El Paso with my little family and finally going to be with my husband again. And now, Im packing up my house.. I wish I could say that I got it from someone else and its been dormant for years… but I dont know if tests would be negative, even if it was dormant. And if there has never been a breakout, then how do you pass it to someone else? From what I have read, there are some who are carriers but they arent affected by it. Well, what does that mean? Herpes is contracted sexually or skin to skin contact. So how did i get it? Did my husband cheat and contract it, then give it to me? Or have I had it for years? Has it just chilled out in my system somewhere and decided just now.. Is that even possible? Can someone be a carrier for years, and then suddenly be a victim of their own little hidden virus? My question is, could either my husband or myself have had herpes, and never had any symptoms of it, never had any outbreaks at all.. NOT just a statement… I WILL NOT allow all THIS to ruin my marriage. I have been married twice before. I have been cheated on in one of those. This is something worth forgiving and fighting for… the other two were nothing in comparison. I fought for my first marriage even after he had an affair the entire time i was pregnant with our son. I gave him 2 years after that to work on it, or even to feel sorry… I fought for it for my son. But this time, even tho we Also have a son together… Im fighting for me. I want to keep my husband. He thinks its a normal conversation while she thinks hes hitting on her. Im praying there is a better reason for all this. I would take being rufied again and contracting it that way than to find out my husband was unfaithful and gave this disease to me. All of my partners before him btw were people I knew well and all had been tested and were tested regularly and were very careful with whom they were intimate with. None have ever disclosed to me that they had herpes. I am praying to God who probably is not happy with my promiscuity in the past that its been a dormant virus contracted by some unknown person from our past. It was triggered by stress or my shitstorm of an immune system and that is why it has never come up as positive on any test. I literally kneel down at night and pray for that to be the case. Does ANYONE have any advice or more information on herpes than I do? I see me Internist, who is my primary care doc, on monday for one final visit to wrap up meds and tests before I move to Ft. I am going to pretty much read this to him and then beg him to test me in every way possible and to be completely honest and very detail oriented about every tiny fact and possibility. I love my husband. Our marriage and life together is going to be amazing. I just happen to NOW have genital herpes… in my ass. I hope his system is better equip to handle it. I hope its not in his ass. Im an Army wife. My husband is a Combat Medic. I am a mother of two boys. And I have genital herpes. We make poor decisions. We are tested and tried and bad things happen around us, to us, and because of us. And because of our human nature, EVERYONE suffers the consequences. I always took abstinence until marriage to be a very sacred thing.. And then I stopped caring. I know why now. But somehow, sex gave me herpes. And I regret every time I had sex outside of marriage. And every time anyone else had sex outside of marriage. It just straight up sucks. I contracted HSV1 after my husband came home from visiting his two kids. He lied to me about this for years. So he actually has three kids. Right after he got home I went to a clinic with painful urination and blisters. The physician said it was the worst outbreak she ever saw, and told my husband to get tested. He refused, and that told me all I need to know. I do my duty as a wife and take good care of him in bed. Sex is often uncomfortable and sometimes painful, but I know that when I can afford to, I will leave and start over again. This thought keeps me sane. I have been in a relationship with my partner for 11 years. My partner has admitted to sleeping with other women the last 3 years. I did not want to be without him, so I was willing to forgive and work on our relationship. He returned a positive test for HSV-2. I returned a negative test for HSV-2. I know I have HSV-1 because I get cold sores on the lips. I am lost as to whether I should continue my relationship with this person or leave them. I still love him very much but my trust is gone. I am lost and unsure. I wanted to see how did things turn out for you in the end. Did you guys work through it or did it end things for you. In June 2014, my Mom passed away and I had to leave the country and remained there for 8 weeks, all with my husbands support. When I returned on August 1st, 2014, my husband did some odd things.. He went willingly, without hesitation and HE tested positive for HSV2. I bet he went because he had absolutely NO idea that he had HSV2… I immediately went and test and I tested Negative. He proceeded with 5 consecutive lies… 1 that he never had an outbreak 2 That he did have 1 outbreak 20 years ago and nothing since 3 that this ws all before me and he did have a few outbreaks while married to me, then finally, 4 that this dated back 30 years! Overall, the lies continued and he continued to swear that this all occurred before me. My guess and prediction is that he cheated, had no outbreaks, ever, and had no idea he had HSV2.. I accused him of his disrespect as we dated and married… by not telling me about it. Without a doubt, and all his lies, I believed he cheated on me while I was away mourning Mom. All I wanted was the truth. I love him so much, I would have gone to doctors and discussed how we go through this together, how to handle it… but he continues to proclaim he never cheated. How can I believe him. Having had outbreaks during our marriage, there is no way I would not have noticed it or even contracted it. Please help me understand… what are your thoughts? I have just been told the same thing; I have herpes. My husband has a history of canker sores. He was recently sick, like home in bed sick. Two days later we fooled around and yes he performed oral sex on me. A week later I felt something. Then in total 10 days later I had an outbreak. I had NO idea it was going to be what it was. I was tested that day in the office. A swab first then blood work. My NP has reassured me several times that with my husband being sick then us having oral sex he was probably shedding whatever and transferred it to me. Anyways I have been TOTALLY out of my mind!!! I have been unable to sleep, my heart races all the time. I feel like a walking zombie with the same thoughts running through my mind. How could this happen!? I was able to have my blood work retake date move up to see if there has been any change in my levels just to give me some sanity. My husband and I have been married for 20 years together for 23 all together. We both love each other and have been faithful to each other. I had NO idea this could happen. I finally got divorced and met a wonderful man. And he made me forget all about the abuse and made me so very happy. I felt like I had never been in love before. I stood by my man. We were supposed to get married and I talked him into waiting for a while. Well, he had himself committed for 5 days, and I contacted this woman whose number I found on his phone and told her that this was his new number. Well, I never suspected what I would hear. He was having sex with this woman and then coming home and having sex with me. The crowd she runs with had Hep and HIV as they are users. It took 2 weeks to heal but left another sore on my cheek. This sore finally scabbed over but now I have a huge sore on the outside of my nose and on the inside of both my nostrils. These are not cold sores. They look like oral herpes. He swears he NEVER had sex with her that they are just friends but she sent me a pic of his private parts to my phone where her tongue was sucking his penis and balls among other things. There are red oozing sores on her tongue. She called me too, and dumb me went to meet her. She begged me to leave him. I love that man. He swears to me he never had sex with her, but when I met with her I saw the sores on her lips and nose and God awful sores on her hands. Not only do I think I have oral genital herpes but I might have Hep too, and it feels like my hearts been ripped out of me, and I think they are trying to drive me crazy. How could he do that to me and then lie about it? I DID NOT get these sores until after he came home and slept with me too. I HAVE NEVER CHEATED ON HIM and was disease free, and now I could have all kinds of diseases. So I hope my story will help someone else. They never cheat on you and they ALWAYS love you. Like you, we are currently experiencing the same thing. It has be the hardest thing of our lives as couple. One blaming the other and blaming science because we can find a reasonable explanation to all this. We are not in complete denial and want to accuse our previous relationships. But bottom line is that I have it and most likely he has it too. Who passed it to who, we are still waiting for results. However, reading your story helped to ease this pain I feel inside. You gave me another chance to believe that it was not about cheating. I still have to wait for my results and pray that this is 1 and not 2 because I, like your husband, think that it is more bearable and maybe my husband will see it that way too. This situation has only reminded me that he is still the love of my life, but either way, it is separating us. Thank you for sharing your story. So I went to my OB checkup, which was a lot because I was high risk and the test ended up coming back positive for herpes type one! My doctor was a little shocked because she too said that was more common in the mouth and on the lips!!!! I forgot all about that diagnosis until I discovered it this morning!!!! I too have it down there and it stinks but it happens!!!!!! Last week wife got a rash on her inner thigh went to check it out, and her doctor skin doctor told her it was herpes who only visually examined her, no blood test or any other We have been married for 15 years and neither of us had any other sexual partners before or after marriage. She went again to the doctor who insisted that it was herpes and agreed to do blood tests! Waiting for results — although he told her that they might come out negative, but he is convinced that it is herpes. She is an occupational therapist working with disabled and elderly people. A couple of years ago she was diagnosed with MF by the same doctor. I sometimes get these cold sores inside my mouth, and I could have hsv1 but since researching the topic in not sure it is as these might be caused by other conditions. And that why we rarely indulge in oral sex. Could the doctor be mistaken? Or is this a sign that she has been unfaithful? Also, if she has HSV-2 as the doctor thinks and I do have hsv1, could she infect me during intimate relations? I heard that if I do have hsv1, then I cannot get hsv2 — is that accurate?
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